Guessing it doesn’t require a college degree?

Two weeks ago, Saks Fifth Avenue had a sale. You know, the sale before their big summer sale, a.k.a. the sale where I spend at least two mortgages worth of cash on shoes. Within 2 minutes of being in the store, I spy a gorgeous red-orange fold-over clutch made of supple kid leather. Marked down forty percent or thereabouts. After an intense three minutes where I paced the marble floors of the shoe department, while weighing the pros and cons of splurging on a clutch, I slap down my Visa and walk away guilt-free with a Cheshire cat smile adorning my face.

Fast-forward to today, and Saks is having an additional 30% off sale, which brings out the bargain hunter in me. I head over to the store where the following exchange occurs:

Me: Hi, Could you tell me how much this bag costs now?

Upon finding out the new price, Me: Okay, great. Could you do a price adjustment?

Sales Girl (suddenly adopting a Madonna-lite English accent): Saks does not do price adjustments.

Me (pausing for 4 seconds, unblinking): Well then. I’d like to return the bag.

Sales Girl (who is 3 inches shorter than me, somehow manages to look down her rhinoplastic nose while speaking to me): Your loss, darling. (I swear she said “darling.” Sweetie, we live in Boston.)

Once the clutch is returned, and my visa credited, Me: Thanks, now I would like to purchase the bag again. The look on the sales girl’s face? Priceless. I swear she looked like she was trying anal for the first time.

Now, how hard would it have been to do a price adjustment? Did she think that just because it’s Saks, I would be okay leaving the $300 price difference on the table? Sorry dear. I’m not quite that rich- and no sugar daddies either. James McAvoy hasn’t quite accepted my marriage proposal. Neither has Reggie Bush. And don’t get me started on that restraining order Robert Downey Jr. filed two months ago. Stalking Shmalking.