Friday, January 18, 2013

Parenting really loudly on a train

"Yes Matthew, that is a homeless guy!  Can you spell homeless?"

"Well Matthew, the guy is sleeping on the train because he's tired...That's right Matthew!  You have a bed, and you sleep in your bed when tired!"

"Yes Matthew, the announcer guy just said the next stop is 42nd.  Can you count to 42?"

"Sweetie, the baby is crying because it's really tired!  But you're not tired, because you just took a nap.  Can you spell nap?"

"We're standing because the train is crowded and there are no seats.  Now, remember what we discussed about giving up seats on a subway?" 

"Can you show Mommy the girl's hat?  Good boy!  Now, can you point at that man's shoe?  You can touch it, of course he doesn't mind." 

"Well Matthew, the guy smells because he is homeless and doesn't have a home to shower.  Can you spell shower?"

"Well Matthew, the fat guy in the ad can't go up the stairs because he's fat.  But you don't eat fries, because you're a good boy!  Can you spell fries for Mommy?"

"Well Matthew, the people left their garbage on the train because no one taught them how to put things in a trash can, just like I taught you.  Can you show mommy a trash can?  Good boy!  Now can you spell trash cans?"

"Those kids are eating candy because their parents let them, and they don't understand that candy is bad for you.  Can you spell candy?"

"Well Matthew, the two guys on the ad are kissing because they like each other.  When you're old enough, you can kiss a guy if you want to.  And Mommy and Daddy will still love you anyway"

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